Wikipedia

Oh, we love wikipedia. (And wikipedia loves us: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User_talk:StuffBigLawAssociatesLike).

We love it because we can quickly look something up and find the answer to it so as to not sound like a blubbering idiot. We can also quickly look something up so we can sound like a learned pompous asshole (and that is our favorite past time).

But the real reason BigLaw associates like wikipedia is because it saves us time on Lexis, Westlaw, or in the (shudder) actual library. Don’t believe me? Just try this:

BigLaw Partner: Little monkey, find out the state of limitations in Canada and the UK.
BigLaw Tool: Yes, sir! Do you want me to lick your shoes clean too? Because I’ll do it!

Now, go to google (and we also love google). and search “wiki statute of limitations”
BLADOW !SoL for Canada is 6 months for summary offenses. The page also links to the Limitation Act 1980 on wikipedia which lays out the SoL for the UK.

BigLaw Partner: Little Monkey, I need to know the exact tax code section for corporate distributions and adjustments, especially the effects on shareholders and security holders.

BigLaw Douche: Yes, sir! Do you want to also kick me in the shins for fun? Because I’ll let ya!
 
Now, before grabbing the tax code and looking through pages and pages of tiny letters and numbers printed on tissue paper that would be better suited for rolling spliffs, go to google and type in “wiki federal tax code”.
<b>BLADOW! </b> Scroll down to commonly cited sections: Subpart B – Effects on Shareholders and Security Holders (§§ 354-358) 
 
BigLaw Partner:  Little Monkey, can you tell me what the government entity is in charge of trademarks in Norway?
BigLaw Puppet: Yes, sir! Do you also want to fuck my girlfriend? Because I’ll let ya!
 
google: wiki + Norway trademark office and BLADOW! the Norwegian Industrial Property Office (patentstyret.no)
 
(I’m sure there are many more examples but I don’t have fucking time to sit here and illustrate them for you. Well, actually, I do have time, I just don’t want to. Just believe me or else I’ll tell everyone what a bad little monkey you are.)
 
You see friends, it’s not about working hard, it’s not about working smart, or even working that much. It’s about working as little as you can while earning your six figure salary. and that’s what BigLaw associates like. and so we like wikipedia.  
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